People Pleaser's Guide to a Kickass Life

Breaking the Habit of People Pleasing

Let’s be real. How many times have you said “yes” when every fiber of your being screamed “NO”? How often have you twisted yourself into a pretzel to avoid disappointing someone… even if it meant disappointing yourself?

If you’re nodding along, chances are, you’re a recovering people-pleaser like me. And let me tell you, it’s a tough habit to break. It’s like being addicted to caffeine; that temporary buzz of approval feels good, but the crash is brutal.

I used to think being a people-pleaser was a good thing. I equated it with being kind, helpful, and considerate. But I’ve come to realize that constantly prioritizing others’ needs over my own wasn’t a virtue; it was a one-way ticket to Burnoutville.

I was so busy trying to make everyone happy that I completely lost sight of my own happiness. My energy was drained, my spirit was crushed, and my life was… well, it wasn’t my own.

The Turning Point

The turning point came when I found myself in the middle of a panic attack in the bathroom at work. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I couldn’t keep going like this. Something had to change.

And that’s when I discovered the magic of boundaries.

The Power of “No”

Now, I know what you’re thinking. “Boundaries? That sounds scary and selfish.” But trust me, it’s not. Setting boundaries isn’t about being mean or uncaring. It’s about respecting yourself and your needs. It’s about recognizing that you have a right to say “no” without feeling guilty or apologizing.

At first, it was hard. Saying “no” felt like swallowing a cactus. But the more I did it, the easier it became. And the more I said “no” to things that drained me, the more energy I had for things that filled me up.

Self-Care Isn’t Selfish

Another huge lesson I learned is that self-care isn’t selfish. It’s essential. You can’t pour from an empty cup, right?

So, I started making time for myself. I took long baths, read books, went for walks in nature, and spent time with people who lifted me up. I started doing things that brought me joy, not just things that pleased others.

And guess what? The world didn’t end. In fact, my relationships actually improved. People started to respect me more when I started respecting myself. And I finally started feeling like I was living a life that was true to me.

Prosperous Doesn’t Mean Perfect

Here’s the thing: Setting boundaries and practicing self-care doesn’t mean your life will magically become perfect. There will still be challenges, setbacks, and days when you just want to crawl back into your comfort zone.

But the difference is, you’ll have the tools to cope. You’ll have the resilience to bounce back. And you’ll have the confidence to keep moving forward, even when things get tough.

So, How Do You Start?

If you’re ready to break free from people-pleasing and create a life that’s truly yours, here are a few tips to get you started:

Identify Your Needs: What do you need to feel happy, healthy, and fulfilled?
Set Boundaries: Start saying “no” to things that don’t align with your needs and values.
Practice Self-Care: Make time for activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul.
Surround Yourself with Positive People: Connect with people who support you and lift you up.
Be Kind to Yourself: Remember, change takes time. Don’t beat yourself up if you slip up. Just pick yourself up and keep going.

You Are Worthy

Remember, you are worthy of love, respect, and happiness. You don’t have to earn it by pleasing everyone else. You are enough, just as you are.

Living undaunted means taking control of your life and embracing your true self, without the need to constantly please others. By setting boundaries, practicing self-care, and saying no when necessary, you reclaim your power and live authentically. This journey isn’t about perfection; it’s about resilience, self-respect, and courage. So, ditch the people-pleasing, set those boundaries, and start living a life that’s truly yours. Trust me, it’s the best decision you’ll ever make. Stay undaunted, and keep pushing forward. Your kickass life awaits.

Warm Regards,

Coach Undaunted